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Kris Humphries Called Kim Kardashian Fat, Stupid
Let me just preface this post by saying absolutely nothing you’re about to read happened. Not a goddamn thing. Entirely horseshit. Us Weekly reports: After lavishly tying the knot Aug. 20,...
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Kim Kardashian Is On A ‘Media Lockdown’
Seen here pretending she didn’t tip off the paparazzi so she can pretend she doesn’t want to her picture taken, Kim Kardashian has apparently been placed on a “media lockdown” by Kris Jenner who...
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Kris Humphries Wants An Annulment So Prenup Will Be Dismissed
“Our entire marriage was a fraud right down to this prosthetic penis she made me carry all the time. Oh, God, I can still smell the foam rubber…” I want to say I’ve been holding off on covering Kris...
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Kim Kardashian: ‘I’d Get Married Again’
If you thought Kim Kardashian‘s divorce from Kris Humphries crushed her heart, turning into a cynical woman incapable of believing in the power of love again, you’re a fucking idiot worry not, for...
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Kim Kardashian’s Changed, You Guys
Not Pictured: World’s largest black microphone. After experiencing a reasonable amount of backlash for immediately divorcing Kris Humphries once all the wedding checks cleared, the most obvious and...
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Kris Humphries Booed At First Nets Game
Kris Humphries played his first game with the New Jersey Nets last night since his divorce from Kim Kardashian, and apparently Knicks fans take the sanctity of marriage very seriously – or are...
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BEST OF 2011: Kim Kardashian’s Engagement Will Be Televised
Welcome to the magical time between Christmas and New Year’s when The Superficial lazily rehashes all the posts you sick sons of bitches couldn’t get enough of. This year, in lieu of a Top 10, we’ve...
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Kim Kardashian ‘Didn’t Like Herself Enough’ To Go The People’s Choice Awards
“Thanks for showing up when I called. Bye-eee!” When Kris Jenner passed out the family talking points for the week, everyone was in agreement that it was going to be Khloe‘s turn to be in the...
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Kim Kardashian & Kris Jenner Busted Faking Scenes in Dubai For KKTNY
Back in December, we posted the above pics of Kim Kardashian leaving a studio with Kris Jenner to make fun of her “media lockdown” and like all things Kardashian, immediately pissed them out of our...
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Kim Kardashian & Kris Humphries Never Consummated Their Marriage
Kris Humphries is apparently in the middle of proving Kim Kardashian committed fraud and wants to make sure their divorce proceedings are public so people can find out their split was so calculated...
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Kim Kardashian Was Cheating On Kris Humphries With Kanye West The Whole Time
Ever since Kim Kardashian announced their divorce, Kris Humphries has been in a long heated legal battle to have their settlement aired in open court so he can expose the entire marriage as a...
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Kim Kardashian’s Sex Tape Was So Staged By Kris Jenner It Had A Reshoot, Says...
Just some quick background before I get into covering the most obvious fact ever posted on this site: Kris Humphries is fucking terrible at dating women. Just terrible. So right now he’s currently...
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Kris Humphries Got His Rebound From Kim Kardashian Pregnant Like A Genius
It’s no secret Kris Humphries is a gullible idiot, so it only makes sense that he’d follow a spectacularly fake and scripted marriage to Kim Kardashian (That I genuinely believe he thought was real...
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So Kris Humphries Didn’t Get Myla Sinanaj Pregnant Because She Made The Whole...
So remember last week when Kris Humphries‘s rebound Myla Sinanaj claimed he knocked her up? Turns out she made the whole thing up and isn’t even pregnant which she apparently thinks the above pic...
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Kim Kardashian Broke Kris Humphries’ Parent’s Marriage, Too
Probably because they made a son stupid enough to think Kim Kardashian wouldn’t screw him over the second she needed a new storyline for her show, Kris Humphries‘ parents are getting a divorce which...
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Kris Humphries Sued For Allegedly Giving A Woman Herpes, Woman Sadly Not Kim...
A year before agreeing to be Kim Kardashian‘s fake husband, Kris Humphries allegedly had unprotected sex with a woman who claims he gave her herpes and is now suing him for it because apparently you...
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Kim Kardashian Thinks Criticism For Her Fake Marriage Is Just Like Having Cancer
When I first heard that Kim Kardashian had an interview in The Guardian, my first reaction was to roll my eyes and just assume it was some sort of puff piece about whatever the fuck she’s shilling...
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Kanye West Has Two Sex Tapes Now, Kim Kardashian Might Be In The First One...
TMZ reports there’s a second sex tape featuring Kanye West being shopped around now, although I’m starting to think this is all just him preemptively laying the groundwork for when he’s single again...
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Kim Kardashian Admits Kanye West Knocked Her Up Then Fled The Country
While in court yesterday to settle her divorce from Kris Humphries, Kim Kardashian basically admitted she’s been apart from Kanye West longer than they’ve been together. Or in other words, he moved to...
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If Anyone Gives A Shit, Kim Kardashian & Kris Humphries Settled Their Divorce
We have grave questions on our plate today from asking how truly vulnerable we are to domestic terrorism to how legal residents were able to stockpile a goddamn arsenal of explosives, firearms and...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Sent ‘Very Personal’ Photos to Bret Lockett
Yesterday, Kim Kardashian threatened to sue InTouch after they ran an interview with New England Patriots safety Bret Lockett who claimed she cheated on Kris Humphries with him. This prompted Bret to...
View ArticleBret Lockett: ‘Okay, I Just Had Phone Sex With Kim Kardashian’
Last week, New England Patriot Bret Lockett claimed he has photos that prove he had a “physical relationship” with Kim Kardashian while she was dating her now-fiance Kris Humphries. However, over the...
View ArticleKris Jenner Got a Facelift Just for Kim Kardashian’s Wedding
Kim Kardashian‘s wedding to Kris Humphries is going to be a massive television event which is literally the only reason it’s even happening in the first place. So, of course, Kris Jenner got a facelift...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Will Exploit Anything
“Ohmygod, isn’t it so beautiful here in this cemetery where my dad’s buried? The camera shots are going to be perfect. I’m going to look just so beautifully depressed and forlorn and people are finally...
View ArticleThe Whores Had a Whore Wedding: Here’s How Much They Whored
Oh, look, someone got them a white Tiger Woods as a wedding gift. Lucky. If you’ve somehow managed to avoid the fact that Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries got “married” this weekend, Kim Kardashian...
View ArticleKris Jenner Wanted Christina Aguilera To Play Kim’s Wedding For Free
Kim Kardashian‘s wedding is now close to hauling in $17.9 million, so naturally Kris Jenner expected Jennifer Lopez or Christina Aguilera to perform for free because she’s a crazy person who actually...
View ArticleKris Jenner Manages Kris Humphries Now
Because Kris Jenner runs the tightest Sasquatch whorehouse in Beverly Hills, it only makes sense that she’s going to manage Kris Humphries‘ career now because that’s what good mother-in-laws with the...
View ArticleKris Humphries Won’t Be Asked If It’s In Yet Tonight
In related news, Vivid Entertainment has made contact with the “mystery buyer” of Kim Kardashian’s sex tape and set the price at $30 million along with basically admitting this is all just a giant PR...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Wishes She Would Have Eloped
Posted by Photo Boy Self-proclaimed tranny and world-renowned fame whore Kim Kardashian recently told Ellen Degeneres that she wishes she would have eloped. No, really. The smut-peddlers at E! Online...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Is Pretending To Get A Divorce Already
Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries got married practically yesterday, but already numerous tabloids are reporting/reprinting press releases from Kris Jenner that it’s not working out because of Kim’s...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Is Definitely Getting A Divorce
As reports continue to circulate that Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries‘ pretend marriage is over, to me, nothing confirms those rumors more than this little item via Deadline: In what amounts to her...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Is Helping Rob Cheat On ‘Dancing With The Stars’
Last night during voting for Dancing With The Stars, Kim Kardashian posted the above tweet claiming Justin Bieber was taking calls for an hour. Except the number really wasn’t Bieber’s, but instead the...
View ArticleBREAKING: Kim Kardashian Filing For Divorce From Kris Humphries
Saturday night, Kim Kardashian told People magazine that, “That no matter what we do, there’s going to be rumors,” when asked why she wasn’t with him for her Halloween party or basically ever. Turns...
View ArticleKim Kardashian Wouldn’t Move to Minnesota, Is The Bullsh*t Excuse
With Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries‘ divorce confirmed by E! News, it was only a matter of time until story lines from the show are passed off as actual events that happened in real life instead of...
View ArticleReggie Bush Told Kim Kardashian To Divorce Kris Humphries
“This is probably a bad time, but that black paint isn’t coming off like you said it would.” And here we go. MediaTakeOut.com is reporting that Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian had lunch on Saturday –...
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Kris Humphries To Make A ‘Windfall’ From That Wedding Kim Said Nobody Made...
As details on Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries‘ pre-nup emerge, it becomes (even more) obvious that their marriage was a massive scam from the start. Especially considering absolutely none of them...
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Kim Kardashian Is Seriously Going To Pretend To Fix Her Marriage Now
After an entire week of backlash from divorcing Kris Humphries and essentially revealing their marriage as the massive scam it was designed to be from the start, Kim Kardashian flew to Minnesota over...
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Even Khloe Thinks Kim Kardashian’s Divorce Is A Crock Of Sh*t, Hates Kris...
Apparently Khloe Kardashian isn’t thrilled with Kris Jenner and Kim Kardashian tarnishing the proud Kardashian brand by orchestrating Kim’s divorce after only 72 days of being married. Via Hollywood...
View ArticleKim Kardashian’s Lawyer Says Her Marriage Wasn’t A Sham. Well, That Changes...
Because someone who’s paid to protect Kim Kardashian‘s interest is a reliable source, her lawyer Laura Wasser claims Kim’s marriage to Kris Humphries wasn’t a sham because their pre-nup dealt with...
View ArticleKris Humphries’ Rebound Made A Sex Tape Called ‘The Anti-Kim’
Myla Sinanaj was Kris Humphries‘ rebound after Kim Kardashian ended their fake marriage contract early and she’s already demonstrated such Kim-like skills as sloth and lying out her ass, so why not add...
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